This is the End. 

Dear John…

It may all seem selfish to you right now. God, it would seem selfish to me too if I were you but it couldn’t be. 

I tried for a short-while but I wanted more, I wanted so much more. I wanted depth, you wanted to feel overwhelmed… suffocated by constant loving, I wanted rawness, realness, excitement & unfortunately that wasn’t it,

We weren’t it. 

I was a coward, but you can’t , better yet– you shouldn’t hold anything against me because I tried, but somethings are not meant to be. Together we were not meant to be. 

I’m not the kind to shift blame but you kept trying to change me, I was often too much of this for you & too much of that–

 “& You tried to change didn’t you? 

closed your mouth more

tried to be softer

prettier

less volatile, less awake

you can’t make homes out of human beings

someone should have already told you that.”

– Warsan Shire. 

You’d try to tame me but I’ve learnt to make it on my own & love myself enough to never feel alone.  

In the end I apologise for the feelings of hatred & sadness that I may have brought upon you , I apologise for the times i made you believe that perhaps that was love but above all I apologized for making you believe that I loved you. 

Young & naive I did not know what Love was or is but one thing is certain, that wasn’t it. 

…For now I just want to feel equally yoked & that’s ok. 

Ps: You deserve that too. ❤️

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2 thoughts on “This is the End. 

  1. Omw my girl you took the words out of mouth here, like everything I feel at this moment is written here. Thank you really got so emotional reading this. You so talented and never stop writing. I love you my friend !!

    Liked by 1 person

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